

There was once so much optimism for the new year, and then, like many, I found myself wondering Is it over yet?!
But no, I can’t be negative. I’m transforming my mental mess into purpose. Some medical and mental health issues slowed me down, but I’m hoping to gain my momentum in February.
Let’s go into what made me pause, ruminate, and crack this month.
The articles
In regard to feeling down in the dumps, this once-a-month activity can cut your depression risk in half. True? What do you think, friends?
What our non-fiction reads from the past 25 years say about us. What are your non-fiction go-to topics?
How do women and men feel about age gaps? Better yet, you tell me, readers.
My three gifted articles from the NYT:
Platonic Romances and A.I. Clones: 2025 Dating Predictions
Kidz Bop is Still Going, 50 G-Rated Albums Later
She Is in Love With ChatGPT: “A 28-year-old woman with a busy social life spends hours on end talking to her A.I. boyfriend for advice and consolation. And yes, they do have sex.”
So I can understand feeling lonely, but as one expert is quoted in the article: “If we become habituated to endless empathy and we downgrade our real friendships, and that’s contributing to loneliness — the very thing we’re trying to solve — that’s a real potential problem.” Our technological saviors have made us insular. Forget touching grass, we may one day have workshops about touching skin titled “How to Introduce Yourself: Real Life Interactions 101.”
This may be a good time to start my professional cuddler business. Any takers? FMTY.

The music
“Multi-Love” - Unknown Mortal Orchestra
Cool, dreamy, mellow… probably shouldn’t listen to it on my sporadically-desolate-forty-five-minute-occasional-freezing-fog commute with only four hours of sleep, but let’s live a little.
Multi-Love
It's not that this song's about her
All songs are about her
Sun shines underneath us
Fearing new kinds of mind control and just blaming each other
She don't want to be a man or a woman
She wants to be your love
“affection” - Between Friends
Siblings Brandon and Savannah Hudson bring a hypnotic vibe that is also not the best for a sleepy commute.
“Sunny” - Tentendo & Jordan Dennis
Another rhythmic earworm. “Oh, I made it to work. I don’t even remember the drive.”
The art
I learned of Valeria Ko’s artwork many moons ago, and I received this surprise blast email last month:
AND I MISSED OUT.
Her site says the shop is closed, but you’re still able to place items in your cart…??? (Now, as of 2/3/2025, her shop is under construction. Please come back, Valeria!) I’ve perused her sexy prints (not for the prude) for years, but you know, ministry life and money and hesitation and “Where the heck am I going to put that?” (I have The Foxhole now.) Apparently, Valeria’s off the grid, but please check out her magic here.
And to see my favorite… well, we need that web site back up. It recently disappeared, and it makes me desire and melt and surrender…
And inspire. a. photoshoot.
(More on this solo sensuality endeavor, creating shocking social commentary erotic art - a deeper dive from just sexy selfies, coming soon.)
While you’re checking out her art, let me know which pieces inspire you… or make you warm in between your legs.
The books
After going through a DNF fiction rampage, I found my way back to cozy non-fiction. I’m three-quarters done with Emma Copley Eisenberg’s The Third Rainbow Girl. Double murder. Hippie women. Down-and-out Appalachia. Seems obvious, but Emma dives deep to reveal intricately woven layers of the people and ominous terrain of southeastern West Virginia.
I’m also drawn to writers who have and recount their own personal ties to the stories of others; it’s a sort of immersive journalism (not the virtual reality type) or hybrid storytelling with the weight of “This matters to me… and it should matter to you, too.”
The author brings many themes to the surface for the reader to ponder: gender relations, community belonging, savior complex, rural poverty, and much more.
The random
Depending on when you’re reading this today, I’m in some phase of going into general anesthesia or coming out of it or passed out at home or considering doing my DIY lash lift since I won’t be in makeup for 24-48 hours. Polyp removal is fun like that.
posted a relatable piece that gave me the shivers, but I was moved by her words. (And thanks for the chat, Rebecca.)I’m trying to balance my news consumption. I want to stay informed, but I don’t want a play-by-play of everything Donnie T is proposing or doing. He’s still playing the ratings game in his twisted reality show. Substack Notes is getting overwhelming for me as well.
Also overwhelmed by: all the Babygirl commentary. It’s lost its appeal. Unfortunately, the algorithm vomits the same stuff, especially in regard to what’s trending. Give me some grassroots kink and sensuality that’s not based in NYC. Thank you much.
I stopped seeing my therapist because our HRA account is pretty low. Let’s see how much I’ve grown.
is a wonderful soul who should be my personal memoir writing coach. I’m stuck on having my loose ends snipped and personal growth defined, but I need to trust in relatability, meaning admitting to my readers that I haven’t figured out how to put the puzzle pieces together. Working on my baby this weekend.The sun creeping over the Blues in the morning and then becoming a bright gumball in my rearview mirror in the afternoon.
Tiramisu for my husband’s birthday that I think I enjoyed more.
Loving and hating my burlesque routine… and then shelving it.
Chowing down Greek cuisine with my dear kismet friend as we take turns revealing our big intentions for the year. Nothing is “out there” or “too much.” Universe, do not take her away from me.
A Jeopardy tear-off desk calendar on our kitchen table that brings out some healthy familial competition.
Trying to get my body used to sleeping on my back. Had a dream my left nipple turned into spaghetti.